I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own so both of them together is certain death.

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Explore More Quotes by George Carlin

A lot of the people who keep a gun at home for safety are the same ones who refuse to wear a seat b

A lot of the people who keep a gun at home for safety are the same ones who refuse to wear a seat belt.

If you think there's a solution you're part of the problem

If you think there's a solution you're part of the problem.

If your kid needs a role model and you ain't it, you're both fucked.

If your kid needs a role model and you ain't it, you're both fucked.

Some people see things that are and ask Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask Wh

Some people see things that are and ask "Why?" Some people dream of things that never were and ask "Why not?" Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that ...

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    Copulation is no more foul to me than death is.

    Copulation is no more foul to me than death is.

    And if a double-decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die.

    And if a double-decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die.

    Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.

    Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.

    Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny.

    Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny.

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