I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.

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Explore More Quotes by Groucho Marx

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Outside of a dog a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.

I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on I go to the library

I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on I go to the library and read a good book.

Related Quotes to Explore

    For the born traveller, travelling is a besetting vice. Like other vices, it is imperious, demanding its victim’s time, money, energy and the sacrifice of comfort.

    For the born traveller, travelling is a besetting vice. Like other vices, it is imperious, demanding its victim’s time, money, energy and the sacrifice of comfort.

    Copulation is no more foul to me than death is.

    Copulation is no more foul to me than death is.

    The natural thing, my lord, men and women joined.

    The natural thing, my lord, men and women joined.

    To have her here in bed with me, breathing on me, her hair in my mouth - I count that something of a miracle.

    To have her here in bed with me, breathing on me, her hair in my mouth - I count that something of a miracle. 

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