I have no methods, all I do is accept people as they are.

Author: Joan Rivers

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Yesterday is history tomorrow is a mystery today is God's gift that's why we call it the present.

I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again.

It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom.

Never floss with a stranger.

The most effective way to destroy people is to deny and obliterate their own understanding of their history.

Love is when two people know everything about each other and are still friends.

I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.

People don’t take trips, trips take people.