There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.

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Explore More Quotes by Joan Rivers

Yesterday is history tomorrow is a mystery today is God's gift that's why we call it the present.

Yesterday is history tomorrow is a mystery today is God's gift that's why we call it the present.

I hate housework! You make the beds you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all ov

I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again.

It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom.

It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom.

Never floss with a stranger.

Never floss with a stranger.

Related Quotes to Explore

    Every girl who has dated a football player, they all have sex the same way.

    Every girl who has dated a football player, they all have sex the same way.

    Give a girl an education and introduce her properly into the world, and ten to one but she has the means of settling well, without further expense to anybody.

    Give a girl an education and introduce her properly into the world, and ten to one but she has the means of settling well, without further expense to anybody.

    Better to be strong than pretty and useless.

    Better to be strong than pretty and useless.

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