A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

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Explore More Quotes by Phyllis Diller

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.

A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song no matter h

A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song, no matter how bad they are.

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

Always be nice to your children, because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

I admit I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.

I admit I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.

Related Quotes to Explore

    Just as true humor is laughter at oneself, true humanity is knowledge of oneself.

    Just as true humor is laughter at oneself, true humanity is knowledge of oneself.

    Jesus Christ knew he was God. So wake up and find out eventually who you really are. In our culture, of course, they’ll say you’re crazy and you’re blasphemous, and they’ll either put you in jail or in a nut house (which is pretty much the same thing

    Jesus Christ knew he was God. So wake up and find out eventually who you really are. In our culture, of course, they’ll say you’re crazy and you’re blasphemous, and they’ll either put you in jail or in a nut house (which is pretty much the same thing). However if you wake up in India and tell your friends and relations, ‘My goodness, I’ve just discovered that I’m God,’ they’ll laugh and say, ‘Oh, congratulations, at last you found out.

    Remember me and smile, for it’s better to forget than to remember me and cry.

    Remember me and smile, for it’s better to forget than to remember me and cry.

    Wisdom is better than wit, and in the long run will certainly  have the laugh on her side.

    Wisdom is better than wit, and in the long run will certainly  have the laugh on her side.

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