Housework can't kill you but why take a chance?

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Explore More Quotes by Phyllis Diller

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.

A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song no matter h

A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song, no matter how bad they are.

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

Always be nice to your children, because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

I admit I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.

I admit I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.

Related Quotes to Explore

    The only way to escape the corruptible effect of praise is to go on working. - Albert Einstein Quote

    The only way to escape the corruptible effect of praise is to go on working.

    The greatest loss of time is delay and expectation, which depend upon the future. We let go the present, which we have in our power, and look forward to that which depends upon chance, and so relinquish a certainty for an uncertainty.

    The greatest loss of time is delay and expectation, which depend upon the future. We let go the present, which we have in our power, and look forward to that which depends upon chance, and so relinquish a certainty for an uncertainty.

    The big secret in life is that there is no big secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there if you're willing to work.

    The big secret in life is that there is no big secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there if you're willing to work.

    This is the real secret of life – to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.

    This is the real secret of life – to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.

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