The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in publ

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

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Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.

A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song, no matter how bad they are.

Always be nice to your children, because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

I admit I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.

The natural thing, my lord, men and women joined.

Every girl who has dated a football player, they all have sex the same way.

You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

The only time a woman has a true orgasm is when she's shopping.