I get no respect. The way my luck is running if I was a politician I would be honest.

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Life is just a bowl of pits.

What a dog, I got his favorite bone is in my arm.

Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.

With me nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now we'll never see each other!

You can fool some people sometimes, but you can’t fool all the people all the time.

Everything is political. I will never be a politician or even think political. Me just deal with life and nature. That is the greatest thing to me.

Look like the innocent flower, but be the serpent under it.

God respects me when I work; but God loves me when I sing.