I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said "What for?" I said "I'm going to buy some sugar."

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Explore More Quotes by Steven Wright

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it.

I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it.

Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.

Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.

If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light and you turn on the headlights do

If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?

Related Quotes to Explore

    For the born traveller, travelling is a besetting vice. Like other vices, it is imperious, demanding its victim’s time, money, energy and the sacrifice of comfort.

    For the born traveller, travelling is a besetting vice. Like other vices, it is imperious, demanding its victim’s time, money, energy and the sacrifice of comfort.

    Sex is like money; only too much is enough.

    Sex is like money; only too much is enough.

    The reason I've been able to be so financially successful is my focus has never, ever for one minute been money.

    The reason I've been able to be so financially successful is my focus has never, ever for one minute been money.

    Money is numbers and numbers never end. If it takes money to be happy, your search for happiness will never end.

    Money is numbers and numbers never end. If it takes money to be happy, your search for happiness will never end.

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