A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

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Difficult doesn’t mean impossible. It simply means that you have to work hard.

Difficult doesn’t mean impossible. It simply means that you have to work hard.

On particularly rough days when I’m sure I can’t possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100%. And that’s pretty good.

On particularly rough days when I’m sure I can’t possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100%. And that’s pretty good.

Don’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you are done.

Don’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you are done.

We travel not to escape life, but for life not to escape us.

We travel not to escape life, but for life not to escape us.

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    I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

    I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

    You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

    You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

    We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

    We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

    Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

    Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

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