Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're Emo Philips Quotes
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Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil.

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You know what I hate? Indian givers... no I take that back.

You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back.

Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.

Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.

I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky but there's never any gum under any of

I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky but there's never any gum under any of them.

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.

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