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Life has a funny way of helping you out when you think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face. Alanis Morissette Quotes

Life has a funny way of helping you out when you think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face.

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Days of absence, sad and dreary, Clothed in sorrow’s dark array, – Days of absence, I am weary; She I love is far away. Jean-Jacques Rousseau Quotes

Days of absence, sad and dreary, Clothed in sorrow’s dark array, – Days of absence, I am weary; She I love is far away.

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If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they’ll kill you. George Bernard Shaw Quotes

If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they’ll kill you.

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Reader suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. Mark Twain Quotes

Reader suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

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My first time I jacked off, I thought I’d invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, 'This is going to make me rich'. Chuck Palahniuk Quotes

My first time I jacked off, I thought I’d invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, 'This is going to make me rich'.

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Every man loves two women; the one is the creation of his imagination and the other is not yet born. Kahlil Gibran Quotes

Every man loves two women; the one is the creation of his imagination and the other is not yet born.

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Diligence is the mother of good luck. Benjamin Franklin Quotes

Diligence is the mother of good luck.

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In my sex fantasy, nobody ever loves me for my mind. Nora Ephron Quotes

In my sex fantasy, nobody ever loves me for my mind.

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We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation. Lily Tomlin Quotes

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

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Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. Kahlil Gibran Quotes

Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They came through you but not from you and, though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

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