With me nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now we'll never see each other!

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Explore More Quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

Life is just a bowl of pits.

Life is just a bowl of pits.

What a dog I got his favorite bone is in my arm.

What a dog, I got his favorite bone is in my arm.

Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.

Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.

When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.

When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.

Related Quotes to Explore

    Copulation is no more foul to me than death is.

    Copulation is no more foul to me than death is.

    The natural thing, my lord, men and women joined.

    The natural thing, my lord, men and women joined.

    To have her here in bed with me, breathing on me, her hair in my mouth - I count that something of a miracle.

    To have her here in bed with me, breathing on me, her hair in my mouth - I count that something of a miracle. 

    Every girl who has dated a football player, they all have sex the same way.

    Every girl who has dated a football player, they all have sex the same way.

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