If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.
Marilyn MonroeWell-behaved women seldom make history.
Laurel Thatcher UlrichYou know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
Steve MartinGive a girl an education and introduce her properly into the world, and ten to one but she has the means of settling well, without further expense to anybody.
Jane AustenMan can never be a woman's equal in the spirit of selfless service with which nature has endowed her.
Mahatma GandhiAnyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
Groucho MarxBetter to be strong than pretty and useless.
Lilith SaintcrowNot one or two, Subhuti, not one or two, but all the beings - men, women, animals, birds, trees, rocks. All the beings in the world. One should create such a determination that `I will lead all of them into nirvana'.
BuddhaAll the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances, and one man in his time plays many parts.
William ShakespeareA successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Lana TurnerA wise woman wishes to be no one’s enemy; a wise woman refuses to be anyone’s victim.
Maya AngelouBehind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Groucho MarxMan does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
Groucho MarxThere is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won't stand for that.
Steve MartinNo man is offended by another man’s admiration of the woman he loves; it is the woman only who can make it a torment.
Jane AustenA woman has to live her life, or live to repent not having lived it.
David Herbert LawrenceBetween men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
Oscar WildeAll women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.
Oscar WildeSigh no more, ladies, sigh no more, men were deceivers ever; one foot in sea, and one on shore, to one thing constant never.
William ShakespeareGuys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only way more mysterious. The whole point is guys are not thinking much. They are just what they appear to be. Tragically.
Dave BarrySingle women have a dreadful propensity for being poor. Which is one very strong argument in favor of matrimony.
Jane AustenIf a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him.
Jane AustenFrailty, thy name is woman.
William ShakespeareWhat would men be without women? Scarce, sir... mighty scarce.
Mark TwainWomen and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
Robert A. HeinleinWith men he can be rational and unaffected, but when he has ladies to please every feature works.
Jane AustenMen aren't the way they are because they want to drive women crazy, they've been trained to be that way for thousands of years. And that training makes it very difficult for men to be intimate.
Barbara de AngelisFor most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
Virginia WoolfA man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.
Oscar WildeEvery woman is just a different kind of problem.
Chuck PalahniukA woman uses her intelligence to find reasons to support her intuition.
Gilbert K. ChestertonMilitant feminists are pro-choice because it's their ultimate avenue of power over men. And believe me, to them it is a question of power. It is their attempt to impose their will on the rest of society, particularly on men.
Rush LimbaughI'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.
Mitch HedbergThis man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
Henny YoungmanA woman who thinks she is intelligent demands the same rights as man. An intelligent woman gives up.
Sidonie Gabrielle Colette'Tis strange what a man may do, and a woman yet think him an angel.
William Makepeace ThackerayWoman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat.
Oscar WildeA woman never forgets her sex. She would rather talk with a man than an angel any day.
Oliver Wendell HolmesLove him or hate him, Trump is a man who is certain about what he wants and sets out to get it, no holds barred. Women find his power almost as much of a turn-on as his money.
Donald TrumpThough women are angels, yet wedlock's the devil
Lord ByronSometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.
Katharine HepburnI am a woman, phenomenally phenomenal woman, that is your grandmother, that is your mother, that is your sister, that is you and that is me.
Maya AngelouAmerican business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking. It has even stopped hoping for employees, who are educated enough, that they can tell the difference between the men's room and the women's room without having little pictures on the doors.
Dave BarryThe education of women is the best way to save the environment.
E. O. WilsonCuriosity n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul.
Ambrose BierceNo doubt exists that all women are crazy, it's only a question of degree.
W. C. FieldsAny woman who understands the problems of running a home will be nearer to understanding the problems of running a country.
Margaret ThatcherMen marry because they are tired, women because they are curious, both are disappointed.
Oscar WildeWhen women are true, brave, kind and compassionate, the World can have an era of peace and joy!
Sai BabaA single woman, with a very narrow income, must be a ridiculous, disagreeable old maid! - the proper sport of boys and girls - but a single woman, of good fortune, is always respectable, and may be as sensible and pleasant as anybody else.
Jane AustenThere is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.
Oscar WildeWhat a strange thing man is, and what a stranger thing woman.
Lord ByronWomen should be tough, tender, laugh as much as possible, and live long lives.
Maya AngelouWomen need real moments of solitude and self-reflection to balance out how much of ourselves we give away.
Barbara de AngelisWoman and men of retiring timidity are cowardly only in dangers which affect themselves, but the first to rescue when others are in danger.
Jean PaulI hate women because they always know where things are.
VoltaireThere's very little advice in men's magazines because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think "I know what I'm doing just show me somebody naked."
Jerry SeinfeldShe cherished her race. She cherished women. She cared for gay and straight people. She prayed nightly for Palestine and equally for Israel.
Maya AngelouI haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.
Erma BombeckWomen have simple tastes. They get pleasure out of the conversation, of children in arms, and men in love.
H. L. MenckenLet us leave pretty women to men devoid of imagination.
Marcel ProustBlessed be Providence which has given to each his toy: the doll to the child, the child to the woman, the woman to the man, the man to the devil!
Victor HugoThe history of men's opposition to women's emancipation is more interesting perhaps than the story of that emancipation itself.
Virginia WoolfWomen hate everything which strips off the tinsel of sentiment, and they are right, or it would rob them of their weapons.
Lord ByronAs vivacity is the gift of women, gravity is that of men.
Joseph AddisonIf women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
AristotleI like intelligent women. When you go out it shouldn't be a staring contest.
Frank SinatraReputation is what men and women think of us, character is what God and angels know of us.
Thomas PaineThere are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.
P. J. O'RourkeIt is the worst thing you can do, women, is whine... I mean the worst. Don't complain, protest.
Maya AngelouStupid as a man, say the women: cowardly as a woman, say the men. Stupidity in a woman is unwomanly.
Friedrich NietzscheMany societies have educated their male children on the simple device of teaching them not to be women.
Margaret MeadThe marvel of all history is the patience with which men and women submit to burdens, unnecessarily laid upon them by their governments.
George WashingtonThe night shows stars and women in a better light.
Lord ByronAs far as I knew, white women were never lonely, except in books. White men adored them, Black men desired them and Black women worked for them.
Maya AngelouWomen love us for our defects. If we have enough of them, they will forgive us everything, even our gigantic intellects.
Oscar WildeI have worshipped woman as the living embodiment of the spirit of service and sacrifice.
Mahatma GandhiThe natural thing, my lord, men and women joined.
HomerThe only time a woman has a true orgasm is when she's shopping.
Joan RiversThe real ornament of woman is her character, her purity.
Mahatma GandhiPrayer is not an old woman's idle amusement. Properly understood and applied it is the most potent instrument of action.
Mahatma GandhiBlack women have not historically stood in the pulpit, but that doesn't undermine the fact that they built the churches and maintain the pulpits.
Maya AngelouOn one issue at least men and women agree, they both distrust women.
James Russell LowellA woman, especially if she has the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can.
Jane AustenShe’s beautiful, and therefore to be wooed; She is woman, and therefore to be won.
William ShakespeareI hate to hear you talk about all women as if they were fine ladies instead of rational creatures. None of us want to be in calm waters all our lives.
Jane AustenShe wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman.
Oscar WildeThere's no evidence whatsoever that men are more rational than women. Both sexes seem to be equally irrational.
Albert EllisWomen are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes.
Oscar WildeMen's vows are women's traitors!
William ShakespeareI see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything.
Oscar WildeThere are certainly are not so many men of large fortune in the world as there are of pretty woman to deserve them.
Jane AustenThe true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman as the most dangerous plaything.
Friedrich NietzscheA psychologist once told me that, for a boy, being in the middle of a conflict between two women is the worst possible situation. There's always a desire to please each one.
Hillary ClintonAs long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter she is perfectly satisfied.
Oscar WildeI've got a woman's ability to stick to a job and get on with it when everyone else walks off and leaves it.
Margaret ThatcherI have never seen a man as fond of virtue as of women.
ConfuciusHow can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.
Oscar WildeI will far rather see the race of man extinct, than that we should become less than beasts by making the noblest of God's creation, woman, the object of our lust.
Mahatma GandhiThis is an important book the critic assumes because it deals with war. This is an insignificant book because it deals with the feelings of women in a drawing-room.
Virginia WoolfIt sometimes happens that a woman is handsomer at twenty-nine than she was ten years before.
Jane AustenMen always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
Oscar WildeWhen women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands.
H. L. MenckenThe great living experience for every man is his adventure into the woman. The man embraces in the woman all that is not himself and from that one resultant, from that embrace, comes every new action.
David Herbert LawrenceWomen should be obscene and not heard.
Groucho MarxThe story of the human race is the story of men and women selling themselves short.
Abraham MaslowWomen are like teabags. We don't know our true strength until we are in hot water!
Eleanor RooseveltHuman rights are women's rights and women's rights are human rights.
Hillary ClintonWell if Fortune be a woman, she's a good wench for this gear.
William ShakespeareIt's funny about men and women. Men pay in cash to get them and pay in cash to get rid of them. Women pay emotionally coming and going. Neither has it easy.
Hedy LamarrBachelors know more about women than married men, if they didn't they'd be married too.
H. L. MenckenMothers of those days were women of great piety and noble character.They practiced virtue and set an example to the children! only from the wombs of such noble women were born sons of high character!
Sai BabaIt is generally recognised that women are better than men at languages personal relations and multi-tasking but less good at map-reading and spatial awareness. It is therefore not unreasonable to suppose that women might be less good at mathematics and physics.
Stephen HawkingClever and attractive women do not want to vote, they are willing to let men govern as long as they govern men.
George Bernard ShawHow can I tolerate the slightest inconvenience to them the women the children the sick the aged the blind the decrepit that come for counsel consolation courage and cure?
Sai BabaNo one is more arrogant toward women more aggressive or scornful than the man who is anxious about his virility.
Simone de BeauvoirWomen are proverbially too individualistic! There is a popular belief born out of folk - experience that three women cannot live in unison!
Sai BabaIn Hollywood the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally.
W. Somerset MaughamWomen can stand a beating except when it is with their own weapons.
Samuel ButlerAs I've said there were patriots who supported this war and patriots who opposed it. And all of us are united in appreciation for our servicemen and women and our hopes for Iraqis' future.
Barack ObamaA man's brain has a more difficult time shifting from thinking to feeling than a women's brain does.
Barbara de AngelisWomen don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.
Bill CosbyWomen are the repositories of Truth and Culture.
Sai BabaWhat Women Want: To be loved to be listened to to be desired to be respected to be needed to be trusted and sometimes just to be held. What Men Want: Tickets for the world series.
Dave BarryOne can find women who have never had one love affair but it is rare indeed to find any who have had only one.
Francois de La RochefoucauldWealthy women have rights in every country. And poor women don't.
Hillary ClintonThe greatest beauty aid for women is virtue.
Sai BabaI do not believe in using women in combat because females are too fierce.
Margaret MeadWe had three pairs of women's underwear on stage after our show in Seattle. Of course they were on the large side ...
Dave BarryAll successful people men and women are big dreamers. They imagine what their future could be ideal in every respect and then they work every day toward their distant vision that goal or purpose.
Brian TracySilence is an ornament for women.
SophoclesThe most efficient water power in the world - women's tears.
Wilson MiznerBeing a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is simply a good excuse not to play football.
Fran LebowitzReading, solitude, idleness, a soft and sedentary life, intercourse with women, and young people, these are perilous paths for a young man and these lead him constantly into danger.
Jean-Jacques RousseauIf women believed in their husbands they would be a good deal happier and also a good deal more foolish.
H. L. MenckenWomen are the engine driving the growth in California's economy. Women make California's economy unique.
Arnold SchwarzeneggerI believe that the rights of women and girls is the unfinished business of the 21st century.
Hillary ClintonI've always liked men better than women.
Bette DavisGrowing up with the childhood that I had I learned to never let a man make me feel helpless and it also embedded a deep need in me to always stick up for women.
Christina AguileraIn the past decade or so the women's magazines have taken to running home-handyperson articles suggesting that women can learn to fix things just as well as men. These articles are apparently based on the ludicrous assumption that _men_ know how to fix things when in fact all they know how to do is _look_ at things in a certain squinty-eyed manner which they learned in Wood Shop, eventually when enough things in the home are broken they take a job requiring them to transfer to another home.
Dave BarryAfter all what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself, if that were their sole purpose they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi.
P. J. O'RourkeDecisiveness is a characteristic of high-performing men and women. Almost any decision is better than no decision at all.
Brian TracyWe say that slavery has vanished from European civilization but this is not true. Slavery still exists but now it applies only to women and its name is prostitution.
Victor HugoIn nine cases out of ten a woman had better show more affection than she feels.
Jane AustenAll women do have a different sense of sexuality or sense of fun or sense of like what's sexy or cool or tough.
Angelina JolieI never realized until lately that women were supposed to be the inferior sex.
Katharine HepburnWomen: You can't live with them and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something.
Emo PhilipsWomen are considered deep - why? Because one can never discover any bottom to them. Women are not even shallow.
Friedrich NietzscheFashion is always of the time in which you live. It is not something standing alone. But the grand problem the most important problem is to rejeuvenate women. To make women look young. Then their outlook changes. They feel more joyous.
Coco ChanelWomen's virtue is frequently nothing but a regard to their own quiet and a tenderness for their reputation.
Francois de La RochefoucauldThe truth is I often like women. I like their unconventionality. I like their completeness. I like their anonymity.
Virginia WoolfMen cannot count they do not know that two and two make four if women do not tell them so.
Gertrude SteinI think all women go through periods where we hate this about ourselves, we don't like that. It's great to get to a place where you dismiss anything you're worried about. I find flaws attractive. I find scars attractive.
Angelina JolieWhen women go wrong men go right after them.
Mae WestIn too many instances the march to globalization has also meant the marginalization of women and girls. And that must change.
Hillary ClintonI've only slept with men I've been married to. How many women can make that claim?
Elizabeth TaylorMen and women are not born inconstant: they are made so by their early amorous experiences.
Andre MauroisThe only really happy folk are married women and single men.
H. L. MenckenThere is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.
P. J. O'RourkeYou can find women who have never had an affair but it is hard to find a woman who has had just one.
Francois de La RochefoucauldWomen are the largest untapped reservoir of talent in the world.
Hillary ClintonI want to make a policy statement. I am unabashedly in favor of women.
Lyndon B. JohnsonI seem to be getting a lot of things pushed my way that are strong women. It's like people see Hackers and they send me offers to play tough women with guns the kind who wear no bra and a little tank top. I'd like to play strong women who are also very feminine.
Angelina JolieI'm supposed to have a Ph.D. on the subject of women. But the truth is I've flunked more often than not. I'm very fond of women, I admire them. But like all men I don't understand them.
Frank SinatraThere are few virtuous women who are not bored with their trade.
Francois de La RochefoucauldMen mourn for what they have lost, women for what they ain't got.
Josh BillingsWomen must tell men always that they are the strong ones. They are the big the strong the wonderful. In truth women are the strong ones. It is just my opinion I am not a professor.
Coco ChanelFeminism was established to allow unattractive women easier access to the mainstream.
Rush LimbaughThe battle for the individual rights of women is one of long standing and none of us should countenance anything which undermines it.
Eleanor RooseveltIf a man will understand how intimately yea how inseparably self-control and happiness are associated he has but to look into his own heart and upon the world around ...Looking upon the lives of men and women he will perceive how the hasty word the bitter retort the act of deception the blind prejudice and foolish resentment bring wretchedness and even ruin in their train.
James AllenWOMEN preserve the culture of this country with greater tenacity and faith. They keep men on the moral path and inspire them to follow spiritual discipline. Their hearts are tender and full of compassion for the hungry and the distressed. That is why in this land women are adored and revered.
Sai BabaThe reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
Phyllis DillerA man's only as old as the woman he feels.
Groucho MarxNothing can be more absurd than the practice that prevails in our country of men and women not following the same pursuits with all their strengths and with one mind for thus the state instead of being whole is reduced to half.
PlatoI think women are concerned too much with their clothes. Men don't really care that much about women's clothes. If they like a girl chances are they'll like her clothes.
Hedy LamarrI fought all my life for women to make their own choices in their personal and professional lives. I made mine.
Hillary ClintonI always supported the women I worked with having time off to go to parent-teacher conferences and doctors' appointments or bringing their infants into the office.
Hillary ClintonThe faces of most American women over thirty are relief maps of petulant and bewildered unhappiness.
F. Scott FitzgeraldI find very often that very ugly women have really handsome men and vice versa because they don't have any competition. Sometimes handsome men have avoided me.
Hedy LamarrDo not put your trust in rivers, men who carry weapons, beasts with claws or horns, women and members of a royal family.
ChanakyaBrigands demand your money or your life, women require both.
Samuel ButlerThere is a tide in the affairs of women Which taken at the flood leads God knows where
Lord ByronThe man who loves other countries as much as his own stands on a level with the man who loves other women as much as he loves his own wife.
Theodore RooseveltLove is the ultimate theme but it's not just for women.
Will SmithNow what I love in women is they won't or can't do otherwise than lie but do it so well the very truth seems falsehood to it
Lord ByronWhat is it that escapes the observation of poets? What is that act women are incapable of doing? What will drunken people not prate? What will not a crow eat?
ChanakyaWe don't have enough support for maternal leave and the kinds of things that some of the European countries do. So we still make it hard on women to go into the work force and feel that they can be good at work but then doing the most important job which is raising your children in a responsible and positive way.
Hillary ClintonIf women didn't exist all the money in the world would have no meaning.
Aristotle OnassisMoney and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.
Will RogersElections are won by men and women chiefly because most people vote against somebody rather than for somebody.
Franklin Pierce Adams