A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

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Explore More Quotes by Erma Bombeck

In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television.

In general, my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television.

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.

Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog

Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.

Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy.

Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy.

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    Love is when two people know everything about each other and are still friends.

    Love is when two people know everything about each other and are still friends. 

    A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

    A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

    The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.

    The biggest seller is cookbooks, and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.

    Vegetarian: an old Indian word for bad hunter.

    Vegetarian: an old Indian word for bad hunter.

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