The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

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Explore More Quotes by George Burns

Happiness is having a large loving caring close-knit family in another city.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

First you forget names then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally yo

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up, and finally you forget to pull it down.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

Related Quotes to Explore

    Good night and sweet dreams, my love!

    Good night and sweet dreams, my love!

    I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

    I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

    Sex is always about emotions. Good sex is about free emotions; bad sex is about blocked emotions.

    Sex is always about emotions. Good sex is about free emotions; bad sex is about blocked emotions.

    You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

    You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

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