The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing.

Author: Kin Hubbard

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Don't knock the weather, nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.

Some fellows get credit for being conservative, when they are only stupid.

If there's anything a public servant hates to do, it's something for the public.

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.