A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to heaven brag about it to persons who w

A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there.

Author: H. L. Mencken

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Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that someone might be looking.

For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple and wrong.

I hate all sports as rabidly as a person who likes sports hates common sense.

I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.